Brilliant, yet lazy

For a while now I've been plotting out a novel in my mind. Honestly I think it's a pretty fucking solid one, but then again I am the eye and thus far I'm the only beholder.

But before I get my lazy ass in gear and start to write the thing, I've got a few obstacles to overcome:

1. I've never been big on reading. Not that I don't pick something up the odd time, but I really haven't read many things in my day. I was listening to the radio the other day, and some jazz musician was being interviewed about her work. She said that she never listens to any artists, only instrumentals. Apparently she never wants her music to be compared to anyone in particular, so that her work will always be hers alone. I have a friend who writes her own music and she always seemed to be the same; she never listened to much of anything. I tend to agree with that vein of thinking when it comes to writing... the only problem being that in order to improve your skills, you need to learn the rules and find out what actually works in the real world.
2. The book will have to be written from the perspective of a woman. Anyone who knows me can say with absolute certainty that I have no damn idea how a woman thinks, so that's an issue.
   
3. I hate the idea of coming up with names for characters. Whatever I settle on will probably always blow dead bears in my mind.
4. I need a laptop so I can escape the creative vacuum that is my room. More importantly, I need this laptop to be completely disconnected from the internet. Noise is noise is noise.
5. Some parts of the book will need some research. Fiction doesn't mean nonsense after all. Mind you, the lack of internet connection could pose a problem on the ol' lapper.
6. Finally, I have never written a book, and the last time I wrote anything that wasn't a structured essay was probably back in high school. And that was what... seven years ago?

Aside from all this shit, I have ample time on my hands at the moment and I really oughta get started on it. Odds are, this is just a pipedream that'll never see the light of a bookstore (even if I do get it written) but you never know.

You get busy livin', or you get busy writin'