Gymclass Heroes

When I was a kid I used to be a competitive little bastard.
A good piece of my front tooth will attest to that, courtesy of a hockey stick to the face back in elementary school gym class.
There was a kid down the street that I used to battle with relentlessly in sports, and a number of kids I'd try to upstage academically. And alot of the time I did a damn good job of things.

But if you know me today, I don't get too bent out of shape by losing a hockey game or getting a lower grade on tests than my friends. In fact, I don't get too riled up about anything. There's probably been 3 or 4 times in my four years in university that I've been truly pissed off, the latest of which ended in my choking one of my best friends. I had a good reason though, rest assured.

It's hard to say when or why I lost my fire for competition and aggression. It's probably got alot to do with my old man, and how I was raised. He was always of the mind that when it came to sports we all ought to be realistic about our expectations. He knew that none of my teammates were ever bound for the NHL or Premier League Football, despite what the other parents on the sidelines might argue.

Then again, that doesn't explain my initial competitiveness, or the fact that my brother is a rage-aholic when it comes to the simplest of frustrations in life. Come to think of it, my dad and bro are very similar in that regard, despite my dad trying his best to raise us as respectful and level-headed kids. (If it was his intent to do so, I'd say he succeeded with me, but my bro somehow strayed from his original goals. haha).


When I watch movies like Friday Night Lights or Varsity Blues (or any of those typical sports movies), I can't help but feel pity for the people in the real world who actually buy into that shit. The fathers living through their kids; the kids who play through injuries that will end up affecting them for life; the coaches who brainwash kids into believing that anything short of victory amounts to sin.

The mentality of our culture is that winning is everything, and glory lasts forever yadda yadda... But the truth is that some yokels down in Texas winning a state championship in highschool football means absolutely nothing to 99.99% of the world. But impressionable kids are led to believe that somehow they are going to leave a mark on the world by taking a trophy home to put up on the mantle.

The winners eventually find out that winning isn't all it was cracked up to be. They'll still be stuck in their podunk towns with only dim lights at the end of the tunnel (probably because sports took precedent over academics or development of maturity and intellect). More importantly, however, is the impact on the kids who don't win under the pressure of their families, coaches, friends, and even hometowns. Pressures like that can really destroy people when the bottom falls out of the dreams they were trained to conjure up when they hit the pillow every night.

Even still, ya gotta love sports - whether it's the major leagues on TV or just a game of ministicks in the living room. But it all comes down to the reason you're playing I guess.

And maybe that's why I gave up my competitive nature - I came to the point of understanding that the world keeps turning and the clock keeps ticking no matter what the tallies on the scoreboard read.
These days I just don't sweat the small stuff. If you win or lose an insignificant game, as long as you don't let it change you as a person, there's no real difference. If you lose a thousand games and still get up the next day to play again - or if you win a thousand and keep your ego in check - it all balances out.
But I suppose everyone's got a different opinion of what insignificant means.